Atheists & Agnostics

NeoGreen

(4,033 posts)

24. One idea...

Mon Jul 17, 2017, 07:38 AM

Jul 2017

...
1st: Come up with a list of 100 things you may or may not be allowed to do. Just list the actions or thoughts, do not list if you are allowed to do them or not.

2nd: Go through the list one-by-one and randomly assign whether the item is allowed or not allowed (do this randomly, and make sure there are inconsistencies and a definite lack of logic rules).

3rd: Make a list of punishments and randomly assign to the prohibited items.

4th: Make a list of rewards (might be a short list) and randomly assign to list of allowed items.

Finally, make death a prominent punishment and make sure all rewards cannot be quantified (sorry amputees) or can only be redeemed after death.

Write the final version on some old parchment, bury for 1-year, then miraculously find and reveal to the world.

PS
Please, please don't do this, we don't need another John Smith or L. Ron Hubbard.
People be cray enough already.

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How to Write a Holy Text [View all] Brainstormy Jul 2017 OP

First, find your particular deity Warpy Jul 2017 #1

Dietary laws must forbid pasta because, you know, Pastafarians. n/t Binkie The Clown Jul 2017 #4

Trying to slide on that one in this chapter because Brainstormy Jul 2017 #9

your third point Brainstormy Jul 2017 #13

You also need an anti-diety. Mr.Bill Jul 2017 #2

Got it Brainstormy Jul 2017 #6

You need four or five waring dieties. Everyone has to pick one to worship... Binkie The Clown Jul 2017 #3

got to think about that Brainstormy Jul 2017 #10

Who needs a Satan when you have competing false gods to lead you astray? Binkie The Clown Jul 2017 #19

You have to say how any other books purporting to be the holy word are false. Solly Mack Jul 2017 #5

Ok, so let's see Brainstormy Jul 2017 #7

You're way ahead of the game! Just be sure to trademark! Solly Mack Jul 2017 #8

wow! I'll be coming back to this well! Brainstormy Jul 2017 #11

You might want to consider at least one hymn. Solly Mack Jul 2017 #12

Great! Brainstormy Jul 2017 #15

I can see that being a problem. There is a lot that can be used. Solly Mack Jul 2017 #16

Tell a big lie, repeat for a couple thousand years. n/t rzemanfl Jul 2017 #14

That works. Brainstormy Jul 2017 #17

Part of the lie would be immortality so you didn't have to trust folks to carry on for you. rzemanfl Jul 2017 #18

I think it's very simple. Fear is at the core. Lint Head Jul 2017 #20

Um... Lordquinton Jul 2017 #21

That's pretty good Brainstormy Jul 2017 #31

Did I miss this? Did anyone say miracles? Defying nature with some mystifying happenings rurallib Jul 2017 #22

I've included a section on Miracles and Magic Brainstormy Jul 2017 #27

You don't write a holy text... uriel1972 Jul 2017 #23

One idea... NeoGreen Jul 2017 #24

Thanks Brainstormy Jul 2017 #25

Wandering a desert for forty years Glamrock Jul 2017 #26

1. A divine authority. 2. A principle that must be obeyed. 3. People who refuse the principle. DetlefK Jul 2017 #28

Be sure to include many inconsistencies and contradictions in your holy book True Dough Jul 2017 #29

Thanks! Brainstormy Jul 2017 #30