I love you anyway [View all]
I've been a conscious atheist for many years now. I've been through lots of stages, including the closeted, timorous mouse stage, the mostly just uncomfortable what-do-I-do-with myself in X situations ? newbie, the knowledge-acquiring growth stage, the militant in-your-face let's-fight-about-it stage, and most recently the what are you gonna' do, life is too short, you can't wake up folks who don't know they're sleeping stage. I've been ostracized and mocked, but luckily I haven't suffered terribly since coming out. Members of my family, while mostly believers, are generally well-educated, tolerant folks. What DOES happen sometimes--it happened today -- is that someone I really like discovers I'm not a believer and says to me, with tenderness and pity in their eyes, that they "love me anyway."
It just stops me in my tracks. My immediate reaction is hostility. Belligerence. FURY! (I know, I know. ) It's like I want to punch out this person who "loves me anyway" because I'm rational.
Does this happen to anyone else? Is this Freud, Jung, Carl Sagan, George Carlin? Somebody PLEASE tell me you've had the experience of practically wanting to KILL someone who loves you anyway. And then tell me how you handle it. I'm feeling crummy. small. petty. Not very rational.
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