Salon: “I just don’t believe this anymore”: Why I abandoned my faith

[Novara]

6. "I believe in god, but I don't believe in religion."

I did that for a long time too.

Grew up Catholic, left the church when I hit college. Went back almost 20 years later when my sister died and her funeral mass was in the church I grew up. In many ways I was a better Catholic that time around because I questioned more and paid a lot more attention. Then the progressive Catholic church I knew from the 60s became much more dogmatic and regressive and I just couldn't stand it anymore. I haven't looked back. Leaving the second time around, I had no illusions that I'd be struck dead for blasphemy. I just finally knew there was no god, no heaven, and if there's hell, many could lay claim to it being this existence here on earth. I can't reconcile the devastation, hate, cruelty, killing, etc with some sort of divine controller. Nope.

We're humans, we make our own trouble. If we're smart, we manage to get ourselves out of it as well. But if we don't, it's our own fault. Ain't nobody up there making decisions on who is more worthy of grace than another. Nobody will save us - it's up to us to do the best we can to help out each other. What a cop-out, eh? I don't have to lift a finger to help my fellow man because if they're worthy, they'll receive divine help. It just doesn't work that way.

I never wanted kids, and one of the stupidest responses I've received has been "what if people stop having kids? The species will die out." Well, then maybe the fucking planet might have a chance to survive. We're sure not doing it any favors. What makes humans so special anyway? We screw up everything! So we die out as a species. So what?