I find myself in the position now of having to accept where I currently am in terms of my inner world.
I do not have a great desire for material wealth. I'd like to have enough money so I wouldn't have to work so hard, but I don't want a lot possessions. So I don't have a lot of suffering associated with material wealth. I generally have what I need and that is enough.
About 23 years ago when I was 20 years old, I found myself studying Eastern philosophy. I was also reading about counterculture gurus and the use of psychedelic drugs. I came to think of the use of psychedelics as a short-cut to enlightenment and started experimenting with them. That turned out to be a big mistake on my part. I know psychedelics help a lot of people, but they can also uncover latent mental illnesses. I may have become sick sooner or later without the use of drugs, but after one of night of a very strong acid trip, I became extremely mentally ill. We're talking a dramatic change for the worse in the space of eight hours. It was not short-lived, either. I suffered from the symptoms of the illness for ten years before I finally got the proper treatment.
I've been well for almost 13 years now. My psychiatric medication has been a much greater tool of enlightenment than LSD. I'm finding myself back now to where I was when I was twenty. I am much wiser now about the ways of the world, but in terms of spiritual development, I have a long way to go.
= new reply since forum marked as read