I used to be a fat white guy in TN. Then I moved to Miami and lost a lot of weight. Started working out and was in decent shape. I was certainly no stand-out or star in Miami with all of the gorgeous bodies there. Then I moved to Portland, OR. Since I had tried to live up to Miami standards for my body I was a bit ahead of most of the crowd in the Pacific NW. Not trying to be an ass. It's just a lot easier to wear a sweater here in PDX rather than have to be in a tank-top in MIA.
I went out to the bars of course. I still carried with me the shyness and the body-shame of not being as good-looking as all those other guys in Miami. So I was shy. Perhaps I put on an air of being unapproachable. That was not due to my thoughts that I'm so wonderful. It was due to my shyness and history of body-shame.
Some people certainly did assume the opposite as you suggest. Once I had a guy (Yep, I'm gay and looks are really too important in gay life) come over to me and tell me that I should stop acting like "I'm all that." That totally shocked me because I've never thought I was "All that and a bag of chips."
Yep, I'm shy. Given my past history I'm uncomfortable in some social situations. I'm actually easy to get along with though. Not "stuck up" at all.
So yes, I've run into that too.
On Edit:
Like silverweb says, aging does have its benefits. Now that I'm 30 with 20 years of added experience (aka 50) I worry a lot less about things and don't feel I have to be a hot young gay male. Well, because I'm not anymore. 
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