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Atheists & Agnostics

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orangecrush

(21,817 posts)
Mon Jul 15, 2024, 10:20 AM Jul 2024

So my S.O. just informed me she may be joining a fundy church [View all]


I thought this group might be the place to get some sane answers.

We are both over 50, known each other for 30 years or so. She has always been a very tolerant and even minded person, and has done a lot to help disadvantaged kids in the neighborhood. Basically has a heart of gold.

She does home care for elderly, got to be friends with the family of a client. Went to bingo with the daughter and son in law of the client. I wasn't invited, but didn't worry about it.

Last night she informed me she is attending a "prayer meeting" tonight for 3 hours at the AOG church, a fundamentalist Pentecostal megachurch near us, and will be attending services with them on Sundays.

I had some rather ugly run ins with some of these fundies back in the Bush years, when Ridge was my governor. I know what they represent quite well.

I showed her a couple of news articles that gave examples of cult like and even illegal acts by this group (members held a young woman they claimed was "demonically possessed" prisoner until she suffered a nervous breakdown, this was in a different area. The woman won a settlement.)

She became very defensive.

I do know I do not want any fundies in my life, and told her why.

Any advice on dealing with cult recruiters would be appreciated.

49 replies = new reply since forum marked as read
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Get out. Run do not walk. Autumn Jul 2024 #1
Start packing. flying_wahini Jul 2024 #2
Study the things Jesus said which they don't IbogaProject Jul 2024 #3
They believe homosexuality is a "sin" orangecrush Jul 2024 #7
First of all, they do study those things Zoomie1986 Aug 2024 #45
Thank you IbogaProject Aug 2024 #48
She's a free American. Unfortunately she has made her decisions. LakeArenal Jul 2024 #4
I got into it with a few of them orangecrush Jul 2024 #6
You dont want to go down this road gay texan Jul 2024 #5
Yeah, that's a given orangecrush Jul 2024 #8
I have a sister-in-law in this space for over 30 years. NNadir Jul 2024 #9
Hmmm... progressoid Jul 2024 #10
I suggested orangecrush Jul 2024 #12
I kind of get that. progressoid Jul 2024 #15
Except that's not how it works in reality Zoomie1986 Aug 2024 #46
Have you asked her why she wants to go? intheflow Jul 2024 #11
Best answer, thanks orangecrush Jul 2024 #13
Congrats on your 10 years! intheflow Jul 2024 #14
Humans are infinitesimally tiny orangecrush Jul 2024 #16
Agnostic isn't a religious position. Zoomie1986 Aug 2024 #47
Great advice. I attend a UU Fellowship and multigraincracker Jul 2024 #28
If you like the Red Letter Bible, you might also like the Jefferson Bible. intheflow Jul 2024 #38
Practice kindness. Buzz cook Jul 2024 #17
Great response orangecrush Jul 2024 #20
You don't want to make her defensive, so no more confrontations, they don't work. Warpy Jul 2024 #18
This message was self-deleted by its author orangecrush Jul 2024 #21
Thanks Warpy orangecrush Jul 2024 #23
You refer to this person as your S.O. Collimator Jul 2024 #19
Thank you orangecrush Jul 2024 #22
I grew up in a fundy church. HeartsCanHope Jul 2024 #24
Thanks so much orangecrush Jul 2024 #31
Thank you. HeartsCanHope Jul 2024 #37
I would suggest a gift of 2 books: LT Barclay Jul 2024 #25
Thanks much! orangecrush Jul 2024 #32
Suggest a unitarian universalist church as a compromise? GPV Jul 2024 #26
Possibly orangecrush Jul 2024 #33
let her know you are willing to sacrifice your relationship.... samnsara Jul 2024 #27
Yep orangecrush Jul 2024 #36
Did she tell you MorbidButterflyTat Jul 2024 #29
Discussion was had orangecrush Jul 2024 #30
I would approach the situation from a realpolitik perspective. UniqueUserName Jul 2024 #34
Interesting orangecrush Jul 2024 #35
A thought... HeartsCanHope Jul 2024 #39
I believe the community thing orangecrush Jul 2024 #40
Then I think what you said about riding it out is the right approach. HeartsCanHope Jul 2024 #41
Thank you orangecrush Jul 2024 #42
Did she tell you Faux pas Jul 2024 #43
I was married to a very religious person Farmer-Rick Aug 2024 #44
I can tell you now that your relationship is probably over. Zoomie1986 Aug 2024 #49
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