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Feminists

In reply to the discussion: It’s Time For No-Wave Feminism [View all]

redqueen

(115,164 posts)
55. I'm going to comment here...
Sun Feb 12, 2012, 07:11 PM
Feb 2012
If a woman MAKES the choice to make porn for a living, who am I to tell her not to? Do I like that she made the choice, do I wish she'd made a different choice? Sure but it is not my place to tell her not to do this. I know all about the issues surrounding porn and women's issues but, again, to me, if we take away that woman's choice, we are no better than men (or other women) who tell women what they can and cannot do. To me, that's sexist. To me, it's not a black and white issue.

We take away people's choices all the time. I'd like to take away people's choice to spank their children. It's not a crime to want to take away choices when you perceive those choices are causing harm to people who don't deserve it (trafficked women and children, coerced drug addicts, runaways, victims of childhood sexual abuse, etc.)


The whole beauty pageant thing that created such a huge kerfuffle; I'm proud that two OUT lesbians made the choice to break that barrier. Do I agree with the concept of pageants? No, I don't but breaking barriers IS a good thing and these two lesbian women broke barriers. Do I wish one of them were the first openly lesbian President of the United States instead of beauty pageant contestants? Hell, yes I do but breaking down any barrier, IMO, is good whether I agree with what they did.

That's fine. Others have the right to disagree without being mocked and insulted.


I see a lot of judgement of other women's actions by some feminists and I think, as I stated above, feminism is not a black and white issue. Women are not black and white, there are shades of grey in all of us and if we treat everything to do with feminism like it can fit in some rigid description, it's only going to continue causing issues within the feminist community. I'm not suggesting everyone has to think of things like I do but I do ask that people think about what they're saying and if what they are saying takes choice away from women or judges them.

There are all kinds of feminists, and we all have to deal with our differences of opinion like adults. Judging the commodification of sex and the sex industry are not judgments of women. That's one of those times when one must strive not to try to see personal attacks in people's criticisms of societal situations.



EDITED TO ADD THE FOLLOWING:
I realized I left some things out.

On the subject of pearl clutching, b*tch and c*nt -- these words don't bother me. I understand how they can be denigrating to some (if not most women or the LGBTQ community) but I choose not to allow these to bother me. There are bigger things that worry me in life. My biggest issue with these words aren't the words themselves but the intellectual laziness that goes with the use of them. So it's likely you will not see me jumping in on threads fighting against these words or phrases. There's also the probability that I am not aware these battles are going on either.

As long as that's something you are consistent about I don't see this as a big deal. If you were to throw a fit about the term 'gynergy vampire', which no one here even knew what it was... but thought that cunt was fine... that might be a little iffy, IMO.



I've seen other's questioned on these things and I think accusing other feminists of not supporting other feminists in certain battles is not productive. As I've stated above, we all are not going to agree about things and expecting us all to agree on all issues and then throwing that in our faces makes nothing but animosity.

There's all kinds of animosity going on in here, every which way. Nobody expects everyone to agree, but I think fairness isn't too much to ask.

Seeing personal attacks flying and being left to stand by juries elsewhere, while disruptors come in here and throw fits about perfectly innocuous phrases like "call a spade a spade", and then having those disruptors reinstated after they have shown absolutely no intention of contributing to the group's stated purpose... that's a giant recipe for animosity, right there. Much worse than expecting consistency with respect to upholding community standards which frown on ALL anti-minority slurs.
It’s Time For No-Wave Feminism [View all] justiceischeap Feb 2012 OP
Gee, I learned something new. New wave or old wave or post feminists. I never thought of it that southernyankeebelle Feb 2012 #1
This will take trust, and calm, and a thick skin seabeyond Feb 2012 #2
I totally agree... Violet_Crumble Feb 2012 #3
Thank you and you're welcome. justiceischeap Feb 2012 #4
i think this is where presumptions and misconceptions come in seabeyond Feb 2012 #5
My thinking goes along similar lines... Violet_Crumble Feb 2012 #7
and what I see is self-interest iverglas Feb 2012 #50
I'm going to comment here... redqueen Feb 2012 #55
Thanks for your well-thought out reply. justiceischeap Feb 2012 #56
Understood redqueen Feb 2012 #57
I'm sorry, after all the animus expressed over the last however many days Remember Me Feb 2012 #6
It should be offensive Remember Me justiceischeap Feb 2012 #8
It isn't unique to women, or feminism. redqueen Feb 2012 #9
I understand it isn't unique to women or feminism justiceischeap Feb 2012 #10
I can HONESETLY say that women are no different from men in that regard Remember Me Feb 2012 #11
You're avoiding/ignoring the point justiceischeap Feb 2012 #12
And one could also argue Remember Me Feb 2012 #42
Justice is cheap and goes to the highest bidder justiceischeap Feb 2012 #43
You know, it wasn't meant as a put down Remember Me Feb 2012 #44
Nor did I take it as a put down justiceischeap Feb 2012 #45
I have issue with it iverglas Feb 2012 #51
agree with this article maddezmom Feb 2012 #13
Thank you for taking the time to read it justiceischeap Feb 2012 #14
I've be doing a lot of reading maddezmom Feb 2012 #38
Great article! Starry Messenger Feb 2012 #15
I think that happens to most adults justiceischeap Feb 2012 #17
because someone disagrees, does not mean they are fools though, necessarily. seabeyond Feb 2012 #19
Thanks sea, but I didn't say that justiceischeap Feb 2012 #25
Yes. We stand together or we fall alone. yardwork Feb 2012 #16
Gotta love a "Lost" reference justiceischeap Feb 2012 #18
I wasn't! Help! I've never seen Lost. Who is Jack? yardwork Feb 2012 #20
Go to Netflix now and get Season One! obamanut2012 Feb 2012 #21
I dropped my netflix account so that I could afford to buy a star on DU! lol! yardwork Feb 2012 #22
Check the library! obamanut2012 Feb 2012 #24
Great idea but I seriously don't own a TV. LOL! yardwork Feb 2012 #28
Only if your computer has a DVD drive justiceischeap Feb 2012 #32
It does! I remember now that's why I realized that I didn't need a TV or cable. yardwork Feb 2012 #33
i could easily get rid of cable and the tv. we only have it because seabeyond Feb 2012 #36
I realized how much I was spending on cable and I never used the TV, so I gave it away. yardwork Feb 2012 #37
There was a TV show on ABC called "Lost" justiceischeap Feb 2012 #23
Thanks! Now I get it. yardwork Feb 2012 #27
Good examples, especially "The Handmaid's Tale". Starry Messenger Feb 2012 #26
Ever since 2000 I think about The Handmaid's Tale all the time. yardwork Feb 2012 #29
She sure did! Starry Messenger Feb 2012 #30
Is it worth the read? justiceischeap Feb 2012 #31
It's great. I don't think it's dry at all. yardwork Feb 2012 #34
Zillion times better than the movie obamanut2012 Feb 2012 #35
It's super-good. Starry Messenger Feb 2012 #39
Great article! Lisa D Feb 2012 #40
You're welcome justiceischeap Feb 2012 #41
The main thrust of this seems to be - don't be nasty, redqueen Feb 2012 #46
I don't know that the author was actually proposing a new name justiceischeap Feb 2012 #47
there's nothing as women or individuals we can do to avoid being stereotyped seabeyond Feb 2012 #48
So you think people won't always stereotype other people? justiceischeap Feb 2012 #49
look at the difference to what i replied to. seabeyond Feb 2012 #52
I agree, we must always try combating stereotypes justiceischeap Feb 2012 #53
of course they do. hence the battle. and women are less intelligent than man, not capable of seabeyond Feb 2012 #54
In theory should be easy since there is much agreement by all who want to advance womens equality stevenleser Feb 2012 #58
i think that is all pretty much a given... steven. agreed. nt seabeyond Feb 2012 #59
Is conflict inherently bad? redqueen Feb 2012 #60
Either way works for me. stevenleser Feb 2012 #61
Hey Stevenleser justiceischeap Feb 2012 #62
I think I do have a slight preference for a more civilized discussion with less argument. stevenleser Feb 2012 #63
justice Whisp Feb 2012 #64
Tides that ebb and flow ChaRipley Oct 2012 #65
What I think is really sad about this is, there are wide areas of agreement across waves stevenleser Oct 2012 #66
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