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yardwork

(64,465 posts)
Sun Nov 17, 2024, 12:19 PM Nov 17

How to talk to MAGA relatives over the holidays [View all]

Many of us are dreading upcoming holidays with MAGA kin we can't avoid. I've been thinking about this and I have two suggestions and a warning.

Let me know what you think. I value feedback and even pushback from my DU family.

Suggestion 1. Politely disagree with blatant falsehoods. Your BIL says some Trump lie at the Thanksgiving table? You're afraid to speak up, because manners. Politely say, "I don't think that's true." Repeat as necessary. Keep saying it, with slightly different words. "That's not what I read." "I don't agree." "That's not my understanding." Repeating, calmly but firmly, is very powerful. Don't feel obligated to cite a lot of facts and figures. You're not trying to change their mind. You're stating your disagreement. You're not going along with falsehoods and bigotry. Silence is complicity. Don't be silent. Don't let them get you emotional, either.

Suggestion 2. When Trump voters talk about how wonderful things will be as soon as Trump takes office, say "I hope that's true." Over and over again. "I hope that's true." Don't argue. Don't try to make them see how bad RFK Jr. will be. They won't listen. Just say, "I hope that's true."

The Warning. Trump has promised the moon and it's not possible for all those wonderful things to come true. When they don't, Republicans will try to shift the blame to Democrats. Don't let them.

Already, here on DU, we hear echoes of that "blame the Dems" strategy. Please don't give into that. Don't assume blame.

For once, let the Trump voters confront their disappointment without letting them shift the blame. Our democracy depends on this.

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All good suggestions... Hugin Nov 17 #1
I like your suggestion best! yardwork Nov 17 #2
De nada. Hugin Nov 17 #3
Or even durablend Nov 17 #16
I must admit... Hugin Nov 17 #31
I needed these laughs! yardwork Nov 17 #42
Fucking keepthemhonestO Nov 17 #63
Seat them in the garage, next to the garbage cans and cat litter box. MrWowWow Nov 17 #4
Pre-Thanksgiving visit-- viva la Nov 17 #5
Perfect response! yardwork Nov 17 #18
This is a great approach. LisaM Nov 17 #49
Tell her to be prepared for SKYROCKETING food prices when all those workers are gone...... AZ8theist Nov 17 #68
I've asked a few people if they were going to clean their own toilets. quaint Nov 17 #98
I asked a relative "who will wipe your fanny when you can no longer do it". No Vested Interest Nov 17 #101
Good plan, DON'T PARTICIPATE! Think. Again. Nov 17 #6
That's not what I'm saying. At all. yardwork Nov 17 #19
I respect your position, but disagree... Think. Again. Nov 17 #21
I agree with the part about remembering who they are. yardwork Nov 17 #46
I don't agree Mossfern Nov 17 #43
That's what a lot of us have done, and it didn't work. yardwork Nov 17 #47
As I mentioned earlier, these are nazis we're talking about.... Think. Again. Nov 17 #50
so just obey in advance then? lay down? mopinko Nov 17 #69
No, non-cooperation resistance would be much more effective. Think. Again. Nov 17 #74
During the last election Mossfern Nov 17 #60
Well, I think that he was a d**k, being that he wore a tRUMP shirt to a family outing. I am glad you ignored him, SWBTATTReg Nov 17 #86
No. Why are you willing to put up with their disrespect? Betty Boom Nov 17 #75
I agree it is important, politely, to make it clear where you stand. Cassidy Nov 17 #66
"How do you know?" lastlib Nov 17 #79
I'm going to ask my farming relatives a question NickB79 Nov 17 #7
I like it! (n/t) OldBaldy1701E Nov 17 #10
I will not be engaging in debates with any maga family members this Holiday season standingtall Nov 17 #8
I'm not saying to debate the lies. Quite the opposite. yardwork Nov 17 #20
I wish you the best for a peaceful holiday. Hope22 Nov 17 #91
If I had a choice between eating at Right-wing relatives house, or going out to Kobe's for Thanksgiving. Baitball Blogger Nov 17 #9
Every time! (n/t) OldBaldy1701E Nov 17 #11
Some of us don't have that option, though. yardwork Nov 17 #23
That's where we're different. Baitball Blogger Nov 17 #24
The beauty of remaining polite and calm is that the disruption is on them. yardwork Nov 17 #48
I would even The Madcap Nov 17 #44
I cut the the abusive alcoholics/addicts and their enablers out of my life long ago. canuckledragger Nov 17 #84
I don't associate with people John Shaft Nov 17 #12
I just slip them valium... hlthe2b Nov 17 #13
They'll be well "medicated" with liquor all by themselves. yardwork Nov 17 #54
I am so fortunate. greatauntoftriplets Nov 17 #14
Same here. One Republican brother who's a never Trumper MaryMagdaline Nov 17 #80
There are some like that, hopefully more than we know of. greatauntoftriplets Nov 17 #85
Pritzker is great! MaryMagdaline Nov 17 #94
Best IL governor of my lifetime. greatauntoftriplets Nov 17 #96
Here is what to say: NameAlreadyTaken Nov 17 #15
Serve yourself a huge serving and surround yourself with all the food kerouac2 Nov 17 #17
I don't. I ignore politics. When around them. The Third Doctor Nov 17 #22
3. Don't go JustAnotherGen Nov 17 #25
Can't avoid it without really upsetting older relatives. yardwork Nov 17 #51
Then make it clear to those older relatives... Betty Boom Nov 17 #72
That's their problem, not yours. NameAlreadyTaken Nov 18 #110
I'm not going to reject my entire family and network of friends because of a few Trumpsters. yardwork Nov 18 #115
But what is there to celebrate, when NameAlreadyTaken Nov 18 #117
We're not. onecaliberal Nov 17 #64
This is the only correct answer. NameAlreadyTaken Nov 18 #109
I'd rather not. RandySF Nov 17 #26
Bold of you to think we will have a democracy. nt. Voltaire2 Nov 17 #27
Morse code. Semaphore. Flashing mirrors. Something with distance. keithbvadu2 Nov 17 #28
I don't associate with Nazis JoseBalow Nov 17 #29
Give them the bird. ⚠️ warning ⚠️ usonian Nov 17 #30
Don't invite them or decline to attend would be my choice. cstanleytech Nov 17 #32
three words to them. "go fuck yourself" NoRethugFriends Nov 17 #33
Is it really true that he has "promised the moon"? Jeebo Nov 17 #34
Good points. However, he did make promises. yardwork Nov 17 #57
You're ignoring the stuff the GOP will do Arazi Nov 17 #70
Not ignoring, just keeping focus. Jeebo Nov 17 #89
He promised no tax on tips, social security, or overtime. Demobrat Nov 17 #76
He might be telling the truth about no tax on Social Security wnylib Nov 17 #105
Bullshit k0rs Nov 17 #35
When listening to them just remember Ping Tung Nov 17 #36
Not a problem in my house Skelly Nov 17 #37
I won't... orwell Nov 17 #38
I won't... orwell Nov 17 #39
Are you kidding? AverageOldGuy Nov 17 #40
That's a nice fantasy but the wife-approval factor is negative. yardwork Nov 17 #53
my wife looks out for me before her family and I do likewise. drray23 Nov 17 #55
I'm with you. FoxNewsSucks Nov 17 #62
I'll be around magas at Christmas this year in Arizona visiting my husband's family. kimbutgar Nov 17 #41
I have a much simpler approach. drray23 Nov 17 #45
I plan not to talk to them at all. Easier on everyone.. Lonestarblue Nov 17 #52
I think this is brilliant. crim son Nov 17 #56
Thanks! yardwork Nov 17 #59
I don't know how people do it. I can't. But if I had to Demobrat Nov 17 #58
"No politics. Sorry. You wanna talk sex or religion?" dalton99a Nov 17 #61
I'm thankful none of my relatives are cultists. sakabatou Nov 17 #65
I'm just going to start with a prayer for my late Uncle Don... rubbersole Nov 17 #67
No. These are no-contact holidays Betty Boom Nov 17 #71
Maga relatives? LilElf70 Nov 17 #73
Here's my suggestion...hey...STFU PortTack Nov 17 #77
First, I'll ask if they have a good appetite and a strong stomach Martin Eden Nov 17 #78
I agree proud patriot Nov 17 #81
I don't ibegurpard Nov 17 #82
Anyone bringing up politics should be told not to. Scrivener7 Nov 17 #83
This won't work for those with loud mouth relatives who can't shut up about it or those who... AkFemDem Nov 17 #87
Thankfully I have no MAGA relatives Fish700 Nov 17 #88
My answer is don't! Hope22 Nov 17 #90
How I plan to talk to my relatives, some of whom probably voted Trump, others I know didn't: Seeking Serenity Nov 17 #92
My personal "favorite" is when someone says Seinan Sensei Nov 17 #93
I don't even KNOW any Maga assholes. We will all be Democrats. Our motto: Living well is the best revenge CTyankee Nov 17 #95
Not one of them assholes will be welcome at our house! bluestarone Nov 17 #97
Put on a sign that reads "I'm taking a vow of silence" Hassler Nov 17 #99
MAGA now owns this bmichaelh Nov 17 #100
bring Leslie Skittles Nov 17 #102
How about... wryter2000 Nov 17 #103
As we usually host for the holidays, it's quite simple. Littlered Nov 17 #104
tg I do not have any relatives crazy enough to support the psycho Meowmee Nov 17 #106
Book on How to Have Fearlessly Curious Conversations in Dangerously Divided Times pat_k Nov 17 #107
It's very simple. I won't. geomon666 Nov 18 #108
Should be plenty of other things to talk about other then politics Raine Nov 18 #111
Our MAGA relatives we have nothing to do with. They would never be invited Emile Nov 18 #112
Sounds like torture. Why attend? travelingthrulife Nov 18 #113
This thread is sad. PennRalphie Nov 18 #114
That's what my OP is about. yardwork Nov 18 #116
TOTALLY Agree... nt Raine Nov 18 #118
I cannot imagine anyone sitting down at a holiday meal with someone they know voted for Trump. hamsterjill Nov 18 #119
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