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Maraya1969

(23,013 posts)
Sun Oct 19, 2014, 11:14 AM Oct 2014

An update about a situation that I wrote about a couple months back

http://www.democraticunderground.com/12491233#post13

In essence it was about how everyone was fighting as how I felt rejected by my mother and my brother and how I couldn't stop hating on my step father. Or that is how I see it now.

I took everyone's advice and actually sat down with my step father and found out that he was hurting also. He apologized to me and I apologized to him.

My brother and I were just arguing about the situation and he was constantly taking our step father's side and I felt rejected by him because I thought he didn't recognize my pain. So I just sent him an email that said, "I don't want to fight anymore. Love, Maraya" And he, (a Christian minister) wrote back, "To this I say happily, AMEN" We've been closer since then then since we were in high school.

And my Mom just called me and I was thrilled about that. We are back to the great relationship we had for several years.

The power of forgiveness. The power of helpful people. The power of love.

Thank you all so much my friends.
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An update about a situation that I wrote about a couple months back (Original Post) Maraya1969 Oct 2014 OP
Very enlightening, I think, and great news! NYC_SKP Oct 2014 #1
..... Maraya1969 Oct 2014 #2
I'm glad things are going better for YankeyMCC Oct 2014 #3
A great post... SoapBox Oct 2014 #4
That is wonderful. I am very happy for you and your family. liberal_at_heart Oct 2014 #5
 

NYC_SKP

(68,644 posts)
1. Very enlightening, I think, and great news!
Sun Oct 19, 2014, 11:33 AM
Oct 2014

I've found that when we are able to really drill down to what's going on behind uncomfortable feelings and behaviors that there is a fear or several fears.

With some patience and communication, listening and mindfulness, we find that we have more in common with our adversaries than either party realizes.

Remarkable in it's simplicity, but it's also astonishing how often we all fail to reach that place where we see our commonalities and offer forgiveness.

YankeyMCC

(8,401 posts)
3. I'm glad things are going better for
Sun Oct 19, 2014, 06:46 PM
Oct 2014

the mind is thought of as a sense in Buddhism, like the sense of touch, when we "feel" hurt it is just that sensing hurt and it's always in my experience not just "my" hurt it is the fact that there is hurt in the universe around you in that moment.

Sounds like when you were able to sit down and openly discuss things that's exactly what you found, the hurt was being felt by your stepfather and others too.

SoapBox

(18,791 posts)
4. A great post...
Mon Oct 20, 2014, 02:48 PM
Oct 2014

So glad that your situation has turned around...amazing how things can change through just talking sincerely, honestly and openly.

Wonderful.

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