My Prayer For Nepal

[Cartoonist]

Some people think that praying yields results, so here goes:

Dear God Almighty, creator of Earth in 7 days.
The plate tectonics you devised worked perfectly.
You managed to kill 2,000 people this time.
I pray you don't kill any more.
I pray the ones you only injured get better.
I pray next time that you give us a little warning.
Oh, and was this because of that gay thing or that abortion thing?
Are we praying to the right God?
Can you come down and clear that up for us?
There are so many to chose from, it's hard to tell.

[bvf]

1. Try cross-posting that in the prayer circle.

[Heddi]

7. oh yeah. That'll go over well

[bvf]

11. It would be worth the hide,

but I can't afford one right now.

Pray for me, OK?

[beam me up scottie]

2. Victim blaming.

Stop picking on God, he can't help it if he's a psychotic mass murderer! He's just acting out because he was traumatized as a child.

[bvf]

3. I'll pray for you, bmus. n/t.

[beam me up scottie]

4. Could you send over a therapist too?

I obviously need counseling for my anger issues.

Just don't send me God's, I don't see any improvement in his behaviour.

[bvf]

5. No, because that would actually require effort.

I feel I'm doing enough by closing my eyes, bowing my head, and muttering a few words of comfort.

Hope that helps!

[beam me up scottie]

6. It'll be twice as effective because you announced it on teh interweb!

[bvf]

10. Bonus!

Well, I guess my work is done here.

[AtheistCrusader]

8. It's all our fault for pointing out that prayer is stupid.

I bet you tell 3 year olds that santa isn't real, too. Then kick sand in their faces.

[trotsky]

12. Yes, it is extremely awful of us to just take people's security blankets away from them.

Far better to condescend and treat them like children who are incapable of functioning otherwise. THAT'S the more respectful thing to do.



I will never understand that.

[PassingFair]

9. Let me see if I have this right...the bad people were smote, smitted, smitten?

But some will be blessed and have miraculous rescues?
Or is God killing the good people so they can live with him in the sky?

I get so confused.

[nil desperandum]

13. Well

in Nepal they are buddhists so the christian god might assume they are worshipping false idols and thus are all bad people...

It really depends on which god sent the earthquake I believe.

That doesn't help much I know, but I do find christians praying for infidels to recover and find the christian god quite confusing myself.

[PassingFair]

14. How can I tell which god sent the earthquake?

This is all above my pay grade.

[nil desperandum]

15. mine too

especially since I don't believe in any of them....

[Arugula Latte]

16. Uh, guys, aren't you forgetting someone?

I mean, sure, God is Omnipotent and didn't have to create Satan in the first place and also should be able to kick Satan's ass at any time, being Omnipotent and all, but if we have learned one thing, it is this:

God.Is.Never.To.Blame.For.Anything.
But.Please.Praise.Him.For.All.Good.Things.

Amen

[bvf]

17. Yeah. That's one of the first things I had a problem with

growing up catholic.

Who in his/her right mind actually creates an enemy?

God is seriously in need of a therapist, or at least a stay at Charenton.

[Arugula Latte]

18. Well, ya know, back when Yahweh was knee-high to a grasshopper,

there wasn't much known about bipolar disorder ...