Addiction & Recovery
Related: About this forumCouple thoughts,
As I pass my year since rehab. 2 thoughts seem to high in my brain a bit lately, and I just wanted to share.
A neighbor ( non rehabbed) said something to me regarding my battle and how he might have liked the drunk better, cuz now I seem moody. I admit, my response was gruff and pointed, and bordered on out of bounds.
He came back bout 45 mins later, and said he was hurt by my reaction and I had no right to react in that manner.
To which I made a point him to him,that Im wondering if I should have bitten my tongue. I told him there would never been a reaction with out his poorly worded initial action.
My 2nd thought is, I dont hide my rehab. But Im wondering if thats the right move. I feel like all the folks who drink around here( full time in campground in TFG section of Fla) are ready to judge me harsher. Reminds me what one of my old coaches told me a long time ago avoid folks who hold you to a higher standard than they do themselves
Interested in some long timers thoughts. Am I over reacting? Still a lot rawer than I realize?
Thanks for reading
Koz
Sherman A1
(38,958 posts)I would not worry one bit about his feelings, he certainly didnt worry about yours .
SheltieLover
(59,610 posts)Sounds as if you taking steps to overcome your issue is making your neighbor uncomfortable...with himself!
Keep up the great work!
Response to kozar (Original post)
Irish_Dem This message was self-deleted by its author.
Bristlecone
(10,489 posts)Getting sober and eventually clear-headed led me to realize that my behavior was a problem (and sometimes still is even sober). If I am out of line, I try to make it right as soon as possible. I apologize or I try to do something right to counter my wrong.
But I also have to realize that people may wrong me, or hurt my feelings. But rather than act out(which puts me into the shit with them and creates a shit circle - just like drinking, drugging, etc), I tell them so and let them clean up their own mess. And not in a condescending or preachy way if I can help it.
I keep my side of the street as clean as possible and encourage and hope others do the same.
Doesnt always work out, but it does mostly.
You dont owe anyone an explanation about your sobriety. If you feel bad about what you said and as you say it was out of bounds, tell your friend so and they will probably respect you for it and see that your sobriety gave you strength. Cause the old you probably would have not had that courage. They also will likely not make you feel that way again around the topic.
My 2 cents. Congrats on a year. It gets better every day
3Hotdogs
(13,398 posts)kozar
(2,851 posts)All the insights. Yes, working on communication skills is a priority. Mrs K and I have been focused on this since rehab. Perhaps I should be more aware as one posted here, and take that effort outside my close support group.
Points are taken. Ty all for sharing.
Koz