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matt819

(10,749 posts)
Sat Oct 31, 2020, 03:30 PM Oct 2020

I hate my local hospital

For lots of things.

More immediately is today’s experience at the ER. Spouse was not feeling well, probably not Covid, but worrisome enough to go to the ER. My wife hates doctors, take to the hospital, and despises our entire medical system. So that’s the context against which we are facing this current issue.

So, I drop her at the door and go to park and then come back and they tell me I can’t go in. Covid. I’ve read stories about this but I haven’t experienced it. Now that I’ve experienced it, I have to say it is a fantastically cruel policy.

Whatever is going on, it may or may not be serious, but it is worrisome. And they are forcing my wife to deal with this by herself.

So, she’s worried, I’m pissed, but they have their fucking policy. I hope they have to experience this themselves. They should be ashamed of themselves as I sit out here in the parking lot and wait for a text or a call or something.


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AlexSFCA

(6,270 posts)
1. it's a necessary policy in the absence of accurate rapid testing
Sat Oct 31, 2020, 03:32 PM
Oct 2020

you both could have been cleared with rapid test.

enough

(13,455 posts)
2. I wonder if it's hard to care for people who come in hating doctors.
Sat Oct 31, 2020, 03:37 PM
Oct 2020

Of course they absolutely have to give the best possible care in every case, but it must take a toll over time.

Ilsa

(62,239 posts)
3. When I took my MIL to the ER, they tried to keep me out. I told
Sat Oct 31, 2020, 03:37 PM
Oct 2020

them, "Well good luck getting a cogent expression of why she's here today, or any detail of her health history. She can't even remember the name of the current president, much less what month it is."

They let me in. But I had to stay with her the entire time. Couldn't even leave to use the toilet.

Maybe if you tell them your wife gets confused and anxious when she's sick, they'll let you be with her, at least until they decide whether to admit her or send her home.

I'm sorry, and good luck to you both.

barbtries

(29,794 posts)
5. this is the policy everywhere.
Sat Oct 31, 2020, 03:47 PM
Oct 2020

we are in a pandemic. the virus is very contagious. It is hateful but it's not a policy meant to be malicious toward you and your wife, it's to try to mitigate damage.

over 200,000 people have died all alone and their loved ones were not allowed in.

samnsara

(18,282 posts)
6. this has been hospital policy since at least April..everywhere in the US...that was when..
Sat Oct 31, 2020, 03:59 PM
Oct 2020

..I drove my husband to Seattle...let him out at the door of UW for cancer surgery. Then I went back to the hotel and stayed there for 3 days...where I was the only guest there. Didnt even have maid service. I got a kitchenette and packed in all my food. The day of the surgery the Dr called to tell me my husband LIVED through surgery and would be dx in 2 days.

So until COVID is contained this is how it will be. The hospital staff cant afford to get sick. They are all we have to keep us the rest of us alive.

I hope your wife is doing well.

Squinch

(52,746 posts)
7. This is not them being mean. This is them dealing with a pandemic. THEY are not forcing
Sat Oct 31, 2020, 03:59 PM
Oct 2020

your wife to deal with it by herself. The pandemic, and the ones who treat the pandemic like a joke, are forcing your wife to deal with it by herself.

sueh

(1,871 posts)
8. I experienced the same thing when I had to take my husband to the ER.
Sat Oct 31, 2020, 04:09 PM
Oct 2020

Our doctor told us he had to admitted through the ER because Covid had injured a kidney. He has stage 3 kidney disease to start with. He had his phone with him and called me when he spoke to a doctor so I could be part of the discussion. Maybe you can try that if your wife has her phone with her.

I'm sorry you're going through this. It's very difficult not being there with her. I hope she is on the path to a speedy recovery.

davsand

(13,428 posts)
9. Took my 90 year old mom to the ER three weeks ago. It was eye opening.
Sat Oct 31, 2020, 05:08 PM
Oct 2020

We had one person with her the whole time, masked and seated in a chair in her treatment room.

Meanwhile, outside the doors to the ER was a group of unmasked people--maybe 8 or 9 of them--who stood there for 4 hours. They were not allowed in and they were pissed. They stood there smoking and screaming at hospital security up to the point the police showed up. It was ugly.

The hospital is doing what they have to in order to protect the safety of patients and staff. It sucks, but there are a lot of people that just refuse to follow any sort of guidelines. I'm sorry you are in the positiion of not being inside with your beloved. I hope everything is ok for her.



Laura

tulipsandroses

(6,220 posts)
10. I hope both you and your spouse feel better. I know its tough. As others have said, its the policy
Sat Oct 31, 2020, 05:17 PM
Oct 2020

everywhere these days. My son had Covid. Even before we knew it was Covid, I was not allowed in the ER. I took him to the ER on 3 different occasions over a month. He was admitted twice. All 3 times, I was not allowed inside with him. It was difficult, I totally get what you are going through. I have been at my son's side for every other medical emergency in his life.

Take heart in the fact that your wife is getting the help she needs. In these times we all have to look out for each other. The hospital has to protect you, your wife, the other people there seeking care as well as the hospital staff. We simply cannot have a waiting room full of people the way we used to.

Hopefully, you don't live too far away. I didn't stay in the parking lot.Depending on what tests they are going run, you could be there for a few hours. I went home and waited for my son to call me. Tried to keep myself busy, hard as it was.

Warpy

(113,130 posts)
11. They are trying to keep you safe. You don't have to like it.
Sat Oct 31, 2020, 06:29 PM
Oct 2020

The policy comes out of the 1918 pandemic, another serious, crippling and often lethal disease 102 years ago.

Army bases were prime locations for severe breakouts due to over crowding and generally unsafe conditions. Families crowded into the hospitals and makeshift morgues, contracting and spreading the disease throughout their families and the communities.

I know you don't want to think of your wife alone, frightened, and not feeling well. Just realize there is a very good reason for this policy, just like there is a really good reason for us to mask and stand apart from people in public. She's likely to be there for a while, hospitals are overwhelmed right now and diagnosis and treatment will take longer.

Trust me, exhausted health care workers are getting this thing and some have died from it. Their families don't get special treatment, this rule is for everybody to make sure the disease doesn't spread faster than it is already spreading.

Nobody likes it, not the staff and not patients or their families. It is simply necessary at this point.

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