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Most of the time, I love DU. Then there are those times... (Original Post) stevenleser Jul 2012 OP
Thanks for being juror # 5. Gormy Cuss Jul 2012 #1
Thank's Gormy stevenleser Jul 2012 #2
What I don't understand is the outrage at being asked - politely - not to use sexist terms. yardwork Jul 2012 #3
I don't understand it either. stevenleser Jul 2012 #4
Sometimes people are very nice. A poster out in GD just edited the c word out of his post at request yardwork Jul 2012 #5
+1 Zorra Jul 2012 #6
+2 Starry Messenger Jul 2012 #7
+3 Gormy Cuss Jul 2012 #8

Gormy Cuss

(30,884 posts)
1. Thanks for being juror # 5.
Wed Jul 11, 2012, 09:41 AM
Jul 2012

I just commented in both d_r's and RC's threads and when I came back here I was happy to see your post.

I don't care all that much if posters use such terms off of DU but I do wish that they'd be more considerate here.

yardwork

(64,377 posts)
3. What I don't understand is the outrage at being asked - politely - not to use sexist terms.
Wed Jul 11, 2012, 02:01 PM
Jul 2012

Do the DUers who become apoplectic at being asked not to use the c word or the p word react the same way in real life? I can understand when the request is not polite. Anybody can get their back up when they feel attacked for using a word or phrase that they didn't realize was offensive. DUers can't be expected to be mind-readers. But when people are asked politely, why do they become so angry?

That's the part I don't get.

Edited to add - I mean to say, the reason this is relevant to the Feminism group is that in real life, women are often accused of being "complainers" or "overly sensitive" when we ask to be treated with the same consideration as men. For instance, most men don't expect to be sexually harassed in the workplace. Unfortunately, many women are retaliated against when they ask people not to harass them. The retaliatory behavior is very similar to what we see on DU - accusations that we are "humorless," that we are "looking for something to be offended about," that we are "demanding special rights and considerations." In other words, many women have a stark choice - we can tolerate disrespect and intimidation in the workplace in silence, or even laugh feebly to show that we "are one of the guys" in order to protect our jobs, or we can speak up and ask that everybody be treated with the same respect and consideration, in which case we are often accused of causing trouble, lacking a sense of humor, being a manhater, etc.

 

stevenleser

(32,886 posts)
4. I don't understand it either.
Wed Jul 11, 2012, 02:52 PM
Jul 2012

Maybe I am approaching it the wrong way. Maybe the approach is, "Do you really want to be known as someone who uses slurs. Would you be happy being known as the kind of person who uses words like n----r, s--c, or k--e? This is the same thing."

yardwork

(64,377 posts)
5. Sometimes people are very nice. A poster out in GD just edited the c word out of his post at request
Wed Jul 11, 2012, 03:55 PM
Jul 2012

He apologized, said that he forgot that the term is especially offensive in the U.S., and edited the word out. It's nice when that happens.

Starry Messenger

(32,375 posts)
7. +2
Wed Jul 11, 2012, 06:40 PM
Jul 2012

And in addition to that, the indignant response at anyone who points out that offensive language might lead others to think the word-user is kind of a jerk. I've never gotten that whole "You chose to be offended" trope.

If it's a word you wouldn't use in correspondence in business or a letter to someone you don't know very well, why would you employ it around total strangers on a website?

Baffling.

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