Conversion therapy and coercion in the contemporary south

[MutantAndProud]

I’ve written in replies over my time here, and to a lesser degree on a older profile a while ago, about some negative experiences with family and conservatives who ended up essentially targeting me for my orientation, lobbying me to change my political views and orientation, exhibiting layers of deceitful/coercive/manipulative behavior over the years, and covering up a past violent abduction and forced participations in religion etc under the guise of various ‘treatments’.

With everything so hostile to the LGBTQ+ community in many southern states none of this is truly surprising. What is new to me is being targeted and harassed by my family and contacts, and having them lie to other family/friends/outsiders and manipulate the situation so intentionally.

What is everyone else’s experience with these kinds of family and ‘friends’ or dangerous encounters stemming from targeted encounters from religious nutjobs lurking on gay apps, and what resources would you turn to if you were essentially isolated, targeted/stalked/tailed, and not financially independent enough to leave a hostile environment without assistance?

I can’t be the only one that’s fallen into traps like this.

[vercetti2021]

1. Told them to fuck off

Also I carry on me at all times.

[MutantAndProud]

2. I have done this

Minus the weaponry, I have no firearms or training. I had a friend who seemed willing to rescue me if necessary (technically I am not facing physical abuse, merely extreme manipulation right now) but some of these resources may have been enough to corrupt him as well, which is what I find more worrisome.

When there is money involved, lures to suck away precious financial resources (ex-roommate pretended not to be able to afford rent alone but later offered to arrange for a rented house when I ‘cooperated’), and extreme monitoring plus a small or nonexistent social circle (I was disabled and in bad physical shape before that encounter on that app so I simply had very few friends)… things stack up.

I need to set out and get some local LGBTQ support/friends in the near future, but I have noticed ‘pop ups’ that are somehow fully aware of my situation regardless of where I turn. I get cult vibes.

[vercetti2021]

4. Definitely get a crew

I have mine and I defend them.

[MutantAndProud]

6. Sound advice

There are only so many options here but I am working on it, just haven’t felt great about getting out much lately. Last time I tried that I was essentially ripped off and betrayed a second time when coming forward to seek help about the first time. Even so-called liberal family members didn’t have the time of day and behaved suspiciously, but family often holds unusual grudges so I don’t know what was going on behind the scenes there. Talking helps though, I appreciate it.

[Chi67]

3. Ugh

This happened to me at 19 in college in the 80s. It's tough. It sounds like your situation is worse though. Mine wasn't great, but it still sounds like you are in a more difficult situation. Are you working? I only ask so I can maybe give you better advice. In the meantime, check this out if you haven't already:

https://legacy.lambdalegal.org/sites/default/files/publications/downloads/fs_resources-for-lgbtq-youth-by-state_1.pdf

It may not have everything you need, but it's a start. Please know this- no matter where you are, there are people who care and can help.

[MutantAndProud]

5. Not yet

Last edited Mon May 29, 2023, 02:20 AM - Edit history (1)

I was grandfathered into SSDI due to age and my doctor is relatively understanding but I don’t think that they know the entire extent. Most professional counseling referrals take many months to schedule these days, I still haven’t set up primary care again yet.

I’m open to starting, I have a variety of capabilities like tech support, but might not be enough to start a resume without credentials/training/apprenticeship etc

And thanks, comforting to hear. The resources that should have been there to help simply aren’t right now, I have *some* reserves I haven’t tried.

Will check that resource out in a little bit.

Edit: technically I did do some work, but it was not voluntary. Art & design, assisting with IP and other concepts etc. All of which I was forced to sign over to the guy I mentioned to allow me to leave. Have received exactly zero support from law enforcement, which is well documented.