Big strong guys, an observation.

[rrneck]

I was in a restaurant today having breakfast and struck up a conversation with the guy in the next booth. Nice fellah. He was about six foot three two hundred ten pounds with biceps the size of my calves. His dress and his tan labeled him for somebody that worked outside, probably in construction. When he got up to leave I noticed he did so slowly with a short pause half way up, as if he were in some pain. He walked with a slight limp that seemed to clear in about ten feet or so.

I've had a lot of manual labor jobs from farming to construction to furniture installation, and it seems that most of the big strong guys I've worked with had some sort of injury related to the physicality of the job. They've always got flat feet, a bad knee or a back that's giving them trouble. It seems to me, based on my considerable experience, that big strong guys get treated like draft animals.

[Tuesday Afternoon]

1. and you think big, strong women Don't? what exactly is your point here, rrneck?

labor is a commodity. no doubt about it.

[rrneck]

3. Women get treated badly as well.

Historically, as baby factories.

When that guy stood up today and paused in pain, he did so knowing nobody was going to rush to his aid. Why? Because he's a big strong guy.

I guess what made me notice was the fact that he parked his jeep so that the reflected sun from the windshield was shining on me. I barely noticed it, but he asked me from the other booth if the reflection bothered me and he would be glad to move it. Here was someone who could easily break me in half, but I've never had anybody offer to move their car in the parking lot for my convenience. And I've worked enough construction to know that when he hits that jobsite, he won't expect anybody to help him if they aren't on his crew, and maybe not then. I'd bet a hundred bucks he doesn't even have health care.

I have a friend who used to be a DI in the 82nd. 'Bout six three two forty. He used to jump out of airplanes with an M60 and kick box for his regiment. I've free sparred with him and that right foot feels like you're getting hit with a fucking tree trunk. He can say with all candor that he really does know about seven different ways to break your neck. You'd be surprised how hard he works to use "small" body language. There are no large gestures or loud vocalizations. He has an MFA and an MA in Art Therapy. And if you get enough beer in him, he will tell you about his time in Iraq and about the soldier stuff he had to do. It still weighs on him.

I don't know if there was an exact point here. Maybe just that we all suffer from the perceptions of others that are designed more for their benefit than for understanding us.

[lumberjack_jeff]

2. True enough.

My landlord fits the description you provided. Nice guy and intelligent, played basketball in college, he spent his adult life painting houses because it made more economic sense than staying in MBA school.

Chronic back pain sucks.

[Gore1FL]

4. We are all draft animals.

Even the ones behind desks. This includes women, too.

What you are describing, it seems to me, is more of an issue with the American economic model--and a very real and disturbing one. The feed used to be better, too.

[rrneck]

7. Very true.

Nice guys finish last, no matter how big and strong they are.

[lumberjack_jeff]

8. The service life of a clerk behind a desk is longer than that of a manual laborer.

We may all be draft animals, but some types of draft animals are sent to the glue factory sooner.

[Major Nikon]

5. They treat themselves that way

A very small portion of the population has a very large amount of muscle mass naturally, but many that you see used some type of growth hormone at least at some point. For the vast majority of people, muscles are self limiting in that your body will only allow you to put on so much muscle. The reason for this is because the underlying bone structure is the same regardless of how much muscle there is. At some point joints start to wear out due to the increased stress.

[rrneck]

6. Well, this guy wasn't "bulked up".

Actually, he had "leading man" looks. And most of the big guys I've known suffer from the same problem. People, and as was mentioned upthread, our economic model, seem to run them into the ground because of their size and percieved strength.

Can we transport the effect of those perceptions across the bulk of the population? Maybe a little. Men tend to be larger and stronger than women. I've had women comment on my strength, and if you saw me you would understand how kind and flattering their comments were. At five ten one seventy I'm not a bruiser. But I am stronger than most women. It's a difference between genders that can impact perceptions and cement stereotypes.

Although this thread doesn't exactly break new ground when it comes to all this stuff, I only noticed it this time not necessarily because of his size or his possible injuries but he was an uncommonly nice fellah. He offered to go outside and move his jeep for fear the reflection from the windshield might be shining in my eyes. And his overall affect was unusually solicitous and easy going. Nobody that big, strong, and good looking needs to be that nice. It was unusual, size and appearance aside.

It's the same old stereotype - women nurture and men project power. And like most stereotypes they hold true generally, but not in the particulars of each one of us.

[fizzgig]

9. my husband moves furniture and is busted to hell

knees, back, feet, hands.... and he usually works six days a week.

i'm going to ask him to push a bit harder on getting a second day a week off, he's going to kill himself at this rate.