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babylonsister

(171,577 posts)
Sat Jul 25, 2015, 09:19 PM Jul 2015

When Obama-bashing ends friendships

I've lost some, but have never been so proud of a President!

http://www.newsobserver.com/opinion/op-ed/article28631017.html

When Obama-bashing ends friendships

“Do you know why Obama hasn’t been assassinated?”

“Because it would be a waste of a good bullet.”

Three strikes, and I’m out.


By Wallace McLendon



I lost a lifelong friend today. Not to cancer or to Alzheimer’s but because of a riddle.

“Do you know why Obama hasn’t been assassinated?” he asked. I couldn’t bring myself to be a partner in this riddle by playing along. I couldn’t bring myself to say, “No, why hasn’t Obama been assassinated?” It made me sick to my stomach when I shrugged my shoulders just to placate him. I felt I had to participate after all these years of loyalty to this life-long friend. I had to stand and take it – to stand and listen to him repeat his riddle yet one more time.

“Well, do you know why Obama hasn’t been assassinated yet?” he asked again. His reiteration caused me to turn and look away, knowing that the answer would be vitriolic. “Because,” and he began to laugh. “Because it would be a waste of a good bullet,” he continued laughing while slapping my back.

Now, this man had been a friend since before we could talk. Well, we could talk, but no one understood what we were saying because at 5 years of age we both had such strong speech impediments that he and I had, in the beginning, our own special insular world that no one else understood. We grew up and played sports together, double-dated together and went to UNC-CH together. Jobs and military service separated us, and it took awhile to get back together, but we did. Moving back to North Carolina was that much sweeter when I learned we would be only an hour’s drive away. Our first reunions were as if we had never been apart. And then there was a change.

My friend became rich, and he deserved every penny. He worked hard, long hours, but as he moved up the income bracket, he seemed to equate the size of his bank account with a sense of being right – about everything. There was no room for discussion. I began to make excuses for even a quick barbecue sandwich together.

My wife encouraged me just to talk to him. “Tell him that you enjoy and treasure his friendship, but make it clear that there will be no more talking about politics.” I knew my wife was right, but when I did try to mend fences, it was not the same. I could not get past his dark heart. So I went about making new friends.
A past work partner returned to Chapel Hill. He had become a pharmaceutical executive, and at our first breakfast together, I listened to an Obama tirade. Then my college roommate returned to North Carolina to join a medical practice. Surely, I thought, here was someone I could renew a friendship with given the great college days we’d spent together. He had been a kind and caring “peace corps” kind of guy, but it took just a little over 30 minutes from the time I walked through his castle-like house on the way to his patio for steaks for the Obama bashing to begin.

Then followed my favorite niece’s wedding where I was certain there would be joy and a respite from worldly thoughts and tiresome politics, but as my niece’s new husband soaked up the champagne, he rolled out conspiracy after conspiracy with Obama’s place of birth at the center of his paranoia.

My wife and I just returned from vacation where we visited a Native American museum in Oregon that made us cry when we stood before an exhibit that told the story of the U.S. military slaying Indian women and children and slaughtering thousands of buffalo to deplete their food source, thus forcing these natives to migrate off of desirable land. I dumped our bags in the living room and settled into my chair to catch up on all the newspapers that had accumulated, and there on the front page was the debate over the Confederate flag that wouldn’t have existed if we hadn’t bought and sold Africans.

I walked into the kitchen where my wife was making tea, steeping the bags in a large glass pitcher, and I watched the swirling liquid turn darker and darker.

“Here,” my wife said. “Drink this. It will make you feel better.”

“If it were just that simple,” I said to her. “If it were just that simple.”

Wallace McLendon, a retired librarian, lives in Chapel Hill.

Read more here: http://www.newsobserver.com/opinion/op-ed/article28631017.html#storylink=cpy
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cilla4progress

(25,855 posts)
1. Terrible. Heartless. Criminal.
Sat Jul 25, 2015, 09:35 PM
Jul 2015

I am so glad, and we are so fortunate, to see President Obama in this part of his arc: enjoying life and his presidency; relaxed and happy; fully himself.

Ahhhh.....

freshwest

(53,661 posts)
2. I've lost friends and associates who I thought were compassionate, good hearted and fair people.
Sat Jul 25, 2015, 09:50 PM
Jul 2015

They liked me as a white person who cared about the same things. Then the change came over and I couldn't take it any longer. It made my circle of friends so much smaller. I hate what has happened to this country. People that have not been deprived of anything by Obama hate him. All from the media and few other sources.

I realized that I didn't fit in with as many people that I thought I did. But I can't stand it and would rather connect with others. It leaves a lot of wounds.

 

Drunken Irishman

(34,857 posts)
3. My mom's sister believes Obama is a Muslim...
Sat Jul 25, 2015, 10:58 PM
Jul 2015

She grew up Catholic in a very liberal household but left for Texas and left the Catholic Church. She then became extremely conservative and now hates Obama with a passion. He's the worst president in American history according to her.

Dark n Stormy Knight

(10,021 posts)
4. It hasn't been friends, but my relatives who have surprised me with their extreme RW Obama bashing.
Sun Jul 26, 2015, 02:31 AM
Jul 2015

They're all from Baltimore and I knew most of them were racists to one degree or another, but I was still shocked by their increasingly rabid hatred of our president.

The worst of them have been transported to some mythological land where our Muslim, foreigner, power-mad, illegal president has stationed tanks in their streets with armed thugs who are taking away all of their freedoms and will any second now take away every last one of their guns.

Their marriages are endangered by the fact that some gays somewhere are getting hitched, their safety is threatened because a "homo" man might be in the men's room with them, and their religion is in peril because some revolutionaries are trying to separate the church from the state!

Not that I had seen that much of any of them since I'd moved away many years ago, but I pissed most of them off by having the nerve to challenge the so-called facts in the batshit crazy RW chain emails they insisted on sending me, or having the unmitigated gall to ask them to stop sending me that vile nonsense.

I feel very fortunate that my parents and 2 of my 4 siblings are pretty liberal. I'm not that close to the other two sibs, and we pretty much steer clear of politics when we do see one another. I have actually come close to disowning self-described "staunch Republican" sister, but, mostly for for our parents' sake, have kept things superficially peaceful between us.

shenmue

(38,537 posts)
5. Wow, that's awful
Sun Jul 26, 2015, 01:41 PM
Jul 2015

Sometimes it does get really bad. I would definitely stop talking to a person who made a tasteless comment like that.

 

awoke_in_2003

(34,582 posts)
6. My best friend in high school
Sun Jul 26, 2015, 05:16 PM
Jul 2015

went on a FB rant about how Michelle and a few members of Obama's family admitted he was born in Kenya. I had a few beers in me, so I said how, being black, he was probably the most investigated candidate for president and the words "only an idiot would believe that he was born in Kenya". It went downhill from there.

Cha

(305,136 posts)
7. I feel kinda sorry for those ignorant bashers who trash Pres Obama. They're on the junkpike of
Sun Jul 26, 2015, 05:18 PM
Jul 2015

history.

Never knowing what it was like to have an intelligent, courageous, compassionate President with a great sense of humor, in their lifetime.. just because some hate radio/faux/ or profiteering left blogger.. tells them to.

mahalo babylonsistah~

Tarheel_Dem

(31,443 posts)
9. It's not just Republicans. If anybody believes, for one second, that all those voices "on the left"
Mon Jul 27, 2015, 12:29 AM
Jul 2015

only have issue with his policies, then Chris Christie's got a bridge..... The Obama presidency has been a real education for me.

Stellar

(5,644 posts)
11. I love that Obama is my President.
Tue Jul 28, 2015, 06:38 PM
Jul 2015

But at the same time, I'll be glad when it's over. It can be sad sometimes when I fear for him.

yallerdawg

(16,104 posts)
12. You outta try livin' in Alabama and support Obama and any Democrat!
Tue Jul 28, 2015, 08:12 PM
Jul 2015

I'm so glad I can come to a national Democratic website for like-minded Democrats!

Well, a group at the website, right?

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