You Can't Make This Shit Up, People...Cocktail Time, Cheers!

[Joinfortmill]

https://ca.news.yahoo.com/kristi-noem-devastated-report-husband-193853825.html

'Kristi Noem 'Devastated' by Report of Husband Bryon's 'Double Life' Dressing as a Woman
The former homeland security secretary's husband reportedly posed for selfies wearing large fake breasts and sent money to online fetish models'

[Attilatheblond]

1. So, playing dress up is ok for her but shocking for him? Or is it just a family thing?

If it feels good, wear it. Just don't hurt anybody, which Kristi most definitely did.

[underpants]

4. 👍😂😂😂

[Irish_Dem]

7. She got large fake store bought boobs.

But that is OK.

[LeftInTX]

34. He got "boob envy"

His fetish was '3000cc-plus boobs,' according to one of the models who communicated extensively with Bryon and agreed to describe their conversations to the Daily Mail.

That's a reference to custom-made XXL implants that can hold more than 3000 cubic centimeters of saline per breast – far greater than surgeons typically recommend.

__________________

Basically, he stuck balloons on his chest. Sometimes the nipples didn't line up...

[Irish_Dem]

45. Good God.

These people are unbelievable.

[ShazzieB]

58. OMG.

I got too curious for my own good just now. I just HAD to gogle "3000 cc breast implants."

Noem's (no doubt soon to be ex) husband is a sick freak.

[LeftInTX]

59. OMG...Based on your response I decided to google it

Noem's husband's are either balloons or something he bought from temu...He didn't have body work done. He's engaged in some type of cosplay.

[Miguelito Loveless]

2. Whatever Christians are worked up about,

it is what they are doing in secret.

[malaise]

14. THIS

Yes indeed

[pat_k]

17. I would just correct to "Christian Nationalists"...

You know, the ones that are hellbent on passing laws to impose their beliefs on people who don't share those beliefs.

If a Christian doesn't support passing such laws, I don't really care what they get worked up about.

[whathehell]

28. Thank You for making that distinction..

I get so tired of seeing Mainstream Christians, who do, in fact, make up the MAJORITY of the faith, being lumped in with the Fundies, the Evangelicals, and Nationalists.

[Old Crank]

75. These "mainstream Christians"

Need to start pushing their beliefs and letting others know that the Christo fascist don't speak for the majority.
Unless they do. Since a majority of the Christian vote has seemed to go GOP and Trump for quite some time.

I too am having trouble separating the good believers of the God of Abraham and the vocal 'leadership'.

[whathehell]

78. ..Love the "quote marks"

Is the concept a new one for you, lol?
I'm guessing it is, as you'd otherwise know those identifying as "Christians" aren't a monolithic group, but one comprised of many denominations that can differ substantively on certain issues.

That said, there's at least one prominent Christian leader, Pope Leo IV, who's been quite critical of Trump's regime, most recently on their war and immigration policies.

[Old Crank]

79. I am really glad that he is speaking out.

I do understand that there are many groups of Christians, Muslims and Jewish people. The ones I know are aghast at how much sway the radical members of their religeons have.

[whathehell]

80. Yes, I think that's important. n/t

[paleotn]

22. You cracked the code.

Growing up in fundigelical religion, I learned that early on.

[niyad]

3. Snicker

[Keepthesoulalive]

5. The party of family values

Hypocrisy is thy name.

[agingdem]

46. I thought (for about three seconds) maybe I should feel sorry

for the guy but then it occurred to me he allowed his ludicrous wife to cuckold him for years...

here's the audacious part...Krispi wants privacy now that hubby has been exposed cross-dressing...this vulgar Barbie spent taxpayer money draped in ridiculous outfits as ICE agents harassed and beat protesters..this repugnant Annie Oakley wannabe starred in a commercial, again taxpayer funded, riding a horse, wearing a cowboy hat, cowboy boots, and chaps (yes chaps!)...and now she wants privacy...not gonna happen!!

[Grins]

74. That party that screams "GROOMERS!!!!" NM

[Captain Zero]

6. He was probably jealous of all her clothes and

Decided he could dress up and be a pretty girl too.

[Buddyzbuddy]

33. Maybe the other way around.

[LeftInTX]

36. Na.........

He looks like he's got mismatched balloons in his chest. It's not attractive. I saw the pics. It reminds me of when people stuff their butts with outrageous sized pads. We see those types at the flea market around here....Yeah..I know..flea market.... It's like Halloween...

[WestMichRad]

55. Thank for for the warning

… and for sparing me the trauma of seeing that.

[Sneederbunk]

8. Lindsey Graham: Is this wrong?

Waiting to hear from Franklin Graham.

[MustLoveBeagles]

9. I don't care what he does

I care very much about what SHE did.

[Joinfortmill]

11. Yup. But it seems like a fitting karmic moment

Last edited Tue Mar 31, 2026, 08:01 PM - Edit history (1)

[MustLoveBeagles]

47. It really does

[Pisces]

10. Have worked all over the country, red states have the most sexual H.R. issues than any blue state. The most twisted

crazy stories out of red America. Suppression creates bad scenarios. You would think NY, LA would be the deviants. Ask any national HR manager and see what they say.

[MustLoveBeagles]

48. I can believe it

[tonekat]

72. Yep, the repression builds up the desires

Until, at last, the person who has been subjugating their urges goes off like a volcano!!

[UpInArms]

12. Well

They both seem to like to “dress” up

[madinmaryland]

13. At least his dress up time did not cost the country millions of dollars, like his "wife's" did!!

[Pinback]

40. And there have been no reports of him shooting defenseless animals

or posing with shirtless torture victims.

[OGBuzz]

15. That poor guy's been through hell.

His wife murdered their dog and their goat, and has been screwing her subordinate and advertising the fact by purchasing planes equipped with king sized beds.
Husband should sue the f*ck out of her for the pain and suffering and humiliation she has caused him which drove him to his cross-dressing fetish.

[chowder66]

25. This is why I wouldn't put it past her that she leaked this to the press or got her lover to do it.

There was an earlier article about how his family has been urging him to divorce her.

[Joinfortmill]

70. Omg! Lol!

[wiggs]

16. Could have been Noem Kompromat. Blackmail. National security issue. nt

[FakeNoose]

71. You can bet it was kompromat, and Chump and Stephen Miller used it against her

We're learning about this NOW, but THEY knew it years ago ... probably even before Chump's 2nd term. It explains why Kristi never talked about Chump's terrible job as President or as her boss, since he was holding the blackmail info and photos of her hubby.

Not that I feel one ounce of sorrow for her, but now that we know the truth it makes a little more sense.

[Grim Chieftain]

18. Oopsie

[Efilroft Sul]

19. Looks like cosplay runs in the family.

[LilElf70]

20. How could she have not known?

I could care less what he does in his spare time. There are many cross dressers in this country. We live in America. The land of the free. I do find it funny that it's Noems hubby, though. And then, if she did know, she must be very toopid to think that this would never get out. Wasn't Noem and her family vetted? I'd say no. Just like all the other morons he hired.

Try this in the middle east and see how far it gets you. Or how about North Korea.

[Bev54]

21. Oh Bullshit, he expressed to her that it could be a security risk.

I have no doubt she has known about it for a very long time. At least we now know why he stayed with her through her affair, he had his own gig going.

[paleotn]

23. ..................

Tots and pears you evil wench!!

[Ol Janx Spirit]

24. "Devastated" is when your parents are ripped away from you and sent to a hell-prison in another country...

...they are not even from--not knowing where they are or when or if you will ever see them again.

Kristi [REDACTED] Noem can [REDACTED] the [REDACTED] off with the "devastated" shit. SHE has devastated so many families.

Embarrassed; sure. Humiliated; probably. Devastated? [REDACTED] off Kristi.

I only hope one day she will truly know what it means to be devastated....

[Marcuse]

26. Odd. Kristi wasn't "devastated" by the murder of Alex, Rene or Cricket. She celebrated.

Last edited Tue Mar 31, 2026, 07:45 PM - Edit history (1)

[tishaLA]

27. Thanks to this revelation I learned the word "Bimbification"

Which, if I understood correctly, is the desire to be turned into a "bimbo." He apparently shared details about his marriage (and his wife's affair) with fetish models, which is a potential national security nightmare.

[chowder66]

29. Devasted my ass. She knows. She's kills animals and called Americans terrorists after they were murdered by her agency.

I think she set this up or has something to do with it leaking.

[malaise]

65. Nope

This looks like Miller-time leaking.
Word is she’s pissed because she was following his orders.

[LeftInTX]

30. Pics here. DM is paywall. NYPost has them. Can't find them anywhere else..LOL

https://nypost.com/2026/03/31/us-news/kristi-noem-weighs-in-on-report-husband-bryon-lives-cross-dressing-double-life/


I would post the pics, but maybe I'm too nice.

[Joinfortmill]

38. Yikes! OMG! I need another drink.

[llmart]

50. I couldn't resist clicking on the link.

I'm speechless. I will say this though, I'm not buying her story that she was "blindsided".

Even though, I'm getting quite a chuckle out of her bad publicity. She deserves all the humiliation she can get if only for killing a puppy and goat.

[dixiegrrrrl]

53. Wonkette has pics. n/t

[multigraincracker]

31. I just asked Snopes

They had no results yet. I reported as on Yahoo. Com.

Have to check back later. They are on it now.

[LeftInTX]

42. It's all over the place and there are pics

https://nypost.com/2026/03/31/us-news/kristi-noem-weighs-in-on-report-husband-bryon-lives-cross-dressing-double-life/

[multigraincracker]

43. Does she know? Might shoot Drag Queens now.

[JohnnyRingo]

32. Now she has someone to go shopping with.

Blessing in disguise ...So to speak

[COL Mustard]

35. So wait just a damn minute

BOTH of them have fake boobs???? JFC. What is this world coming to?!?!?!?!

[BidenRocks]

37. I wonder if he shares makeup tips

with Rudy.

[LeftInTX]

39. He isn't wearing make up. He's stuff looks really cheap too.

His isn't wearing a wig. His fake boobs are mismatched in some pics...

[LeftInTX]

41. This is hilarious. Needed a good laugh.

[jmbar2]

44. Is this why Trump sidelined Krusti?

This story has likely been circulating for awhile.

[Deep State Witch]

49. Did SD Pass Anti-Drag Laws

Wasn't SD one of the states that recently passed laws against people dressing opposite of their assigned gender or some such BS? If so, wouldn't his online cross-dressing activities be covered under those laws?

Update: Proposed, but voted down in 2023

[Jilly_in_VA]

51. So my daughter said about this...

"And it's Trans Visibility Day. Well, we've seen it! It was visible and I'll never unsee it!!!"

[Blue Owl]

52. Butros Butros Golly!

[Old Crank]

54. Are they grooming their kids?

Inquiring minds want to know.
Is she being dumped from her new fake job?

[LeftInTX]

56. I wonder if Trump leaked to this to distract from his Iran War debacle?

Now everyone is talking about this!

[Blue Owl]

61. It's a motorboat strike

[LeftInTX]

62. Daily Beast is saying that it was from the sex worker who is an immigrant

Paywall removed: https://archive.ph/oCKj3

Mark Caputo at Axios got a lead in Feb, but they couldn't land the interview.

[FoxNewsSucks]

76. I got it!!

[live love laugh]

57. She and her HERSband can go to hell.

[LeftInTX]

60. Hubby said those pics are tip of the iceberg and probably many are "unacceptable" for the press to release.

I bet there's full frontal and BDSM out there...(JMO)

[DET]

63. I'm Sorry, But This is Flat Out Creepy

I generally believe in ‘live and let live’, but this is just plain weird. The two of them are seriously weird. It would be their own business - except that this has (had?) the potential to lead to blackmail against one of the most highly placed (if incompetent) leaders in our Government. I always feel like I need to take a shower after reading about the personal lives of the people in Trump’s orbit.

[Joinfortmill]

69. Yup. They are all liars, cheaters, creepers.

[Javaman]

64. in other news: Noam spotted sporting truck nuts. nt

[dawn5651]

66. saw this last night after i started reading in bed...i noticed mr. noem needs to learn

how to fix his boobs so that one nipple isn't pointing to the stars...lmao

[NNadir]

67. I don't really care about the guy's harmless fetishes but it's the hypocrisy that matters.

If ICE Barbie were my wife - which could never happen - I'd wanna to be someone else too.

She's a horrible person, the worst of tge worst.

[Joinfortmill]

68. Hypocrisy, bigly.

[BlueMTexpat]

73. What a wholesome

American family!

[QueerDuck]

77. I'm sure she knew. It would be hard to hide those pink shorts and breastplate and matching bra or top.

This was their private kink or fetish... I'm not about to kink-shame anyone... I'm just pointing out how unlikely it is that she knew absolutely nothing.

She knew.