Trump Orders ICE to Arrest 67,000 NFL Fans Who Booed Him

[Zorro]

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—In a move that tests the limits of presidential power, on Wednesday Donald J. Trump ordered ICE agents to arrest the 67,000 football fans who booed him at Sunday’s Washington Commanders game.

“This should never be allowed to happen in this country,” Trump said, adding that the booing fans “were paid by Soros.”

Justifying his use of immigration agents, Trump accused all those who booed him of being in a Venezuelan drug cartel.

Elaborating on his claim, Trump said, “Despite our successful air strikes off the coast of Venezuela, somehow 67,000 of these criminals got through.”

https://www.borowitzreport.com/p/trump-orders-ice-to-arrest-67000

[MarineCombatEngineer]

1. The sad thing is that I have to check to make sure it's satire,

because I wouldn't put it past him to do this.

[sheshe2]

8. I did the same thing.

I saw the title and I said WTF!!! Then opened the thread to see it was satire. Until I did, I honestly believed it as true.

PS We should not give him any new ideas!

[LAS14]

9. Me too.

[Moostache]

2. Fuck him.

Seriously. Fuck him hard.

Release the Trumpstein files.
Epstein.
Trump.
Guilty.
Period.

[efhmc]

3. Very clever.

[imanamerican63]

4. Maybe they weren't booing him?

Maybe they were booing Hegseth who standing next to Trump?

What a pitiful petty prick of a man?

[sakabatou]

5. Well, it at least SOUNDS like it's something he'd do

[Torchlight]

6. Today's satire is tomorrow's featured news at the top of the hour

Our boy's mind is so simple he thinks magnets are unknown and looks straight into an eclipse. There's not much I expect he doesn't *want* to do in his attempt to bankrupt the nation into fascism.

[MustLoveBeagles]

7. I had to check if it was Boriwitz or The Onion

[PatSeg]

10. Same here

Isn't that really scary?

[MustLoveBeagles]

17. It sure is

[ChicagoTeamster]

11. Right, how do you think 300 Million people got the drugs for their overdoses last year?

[ashredux]

12. LOL.... it took me two beats to realize it was a joke.

[progressoid]

13. The paid by Soros thing is sooo accurate.

They really love that lie.

[IronLionZion]

14. Not too far from the truth

considering their reaction to social media posts about deceased MAGA personalities. Sharing a MAGA person's own words and recordings is a crime these days.

[Ohioboy]

15. I knew it was satire, but checked anyway

You never know these days.

[niyad]

16. I HAD TO CHECK THE LINK!!!

Last edited Wed Nov 12, 2025, 03:58 PM - Edit history (1)

That is how FUCKING INSANE the insecure, hate-filled little prick is. Reading about him suing all the makers and sellers of anti-him merchandise yesterday showed clearly just how fucking out of control he and his goons are. I put NOTHING past them.